Conflict Resolution Question of the Day #1

You're working with a manager who's not a Christian. They play mind games with you and put you on the spot in front of other staff members. They tell you to do something one way but you were taught a faster or better way. However, this person in leadership won't listen. What do you do?

  • A. Walk away and say nothing because you need your job.
  • B. Do what they ask but keep repeating that you have a better way.
  • C. Take it to God in prayer first and do what's asked.
  • D. Refuse to do it and brace yourself in case you're fired.
  • E. Walk off the job, go home and watch your shows and come back on Friday for your check.

 

The correct answer is 'C'. While people in leadership might be incorrect, God sometimes puts them in those positions for a reason. He might have us in a testing season and want to see what we're going to do. The correct response is taking it to God FIRST. But, please know that wherever there's a threat or it feels like abuse, the Lord said, "Rebuke their personalities." 

Rebuking their personalities means that THEIR words don't cling to you. The devil plays aggressive and controlling games to get under your skin. He wants to cause the spirit of offense and if you get offended, then you're walking in sin and can't hear from God. Jesus explains this in Mark 11:22-26, 

"And Jesus answering saith unto them, Have faith in God. For verily I say unto you, That whosoever shall say unto this mountain, Be thou removed, and be thou cast into the sea; and shall not doubt in his heart, but shall believe that those things which he saith shall come to pass; he shall have whatsoever he saith. Therefore I say unto you, What things soever ye desire, when ye pray, believe that ye receive them, and ye shall have them. And when ye stand praying, forgive, if ye have ought against any: that your Father also which is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses. But if ye do not forgive, neither will your Father which is in heaven forgive your trespasses."

Now that you understand why the devil wants to offend, here's why the other answers are incorrect:

  • 'A' is incorrect because if you don't go to God, the behavior will continue and you might build resentment against the person (what the devil wants.
  • 'B' is incorrect because a person in a leadership role that's trying to undermine you KNOWS they're controlling. It's likely how they reached that level of authority, by being demanding. As a subordinate or new person, if you come against them, they can fire you or write you up for insubordination.
  • 'D' is incorrect for the same reason. You're there to do a job and if you refuse to do it, that's grounds for dismissal. Always go to God in prayer and keep reading your Bible for encouragement.
  • 'E' is definitely incorrect but we threw that in for a good laugh. However, there ARE people who feel like they don't have a voice or a choice. You have both - through God and He will help you. 

 

A good story is about how David overcame Saul when Saul was stalking him. David didn't return evil for evil. David went to God and said in so many words, "Lord, I didn't do anything this manager. I've been good to him and he's attacking me. I can't come against him because I know there are rules. So, I'm calling on YOU for help." And, God did just that.

God eventually made David king. The tests he went through with Saul were to groom him for greater. And God is grooming us for greater, too. But, what about the fact that it's not fair? Yup. God KNOWS that sometimes managers are not fair but God might also want to build your character to make you STRONGER despite what they're doing. And, don't worry. God will deal with that manager.

The Bible says that Saul's armies were attacked and his sons killed. He eventually fell on his own sword. So, do what God says to do and seek Him first. Then, let God handle that boss. Remember, EVERY knee shall bow. The Bible states in Philippians 2:10-11, "That at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of things in heaven, and things in earth, and things under the earth; And that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is LORD, to the glory of God the Father." God's got this and He's got YOU!

When dealing with a confrontational boss, pray FIRST and then use the CALM Method:

  • Clarify the issue and ask yourself why you're upset. Then think about what you're going to say to the other person and practice it ahead of time so you can stay calm.
  • Address the person but don't make accusations with "You did..." or "You said..." Briefly say what you thought happened and how you felt. 
  • Listen to the other person or group. Don't interrupt and don't assume your way is the only way. Paraphrase what they said so you don't misinterpret it and don't dismiss their feelings.
  • Maintain that you will find a solution by establishing that you both have needs. With a person in authority, do what they ask so you're not guilty of insubordination. This creates a win-win for everyone. You've asked God for help and He will guide you.

 

Unsure how to handle conflicts? Want more information on conflict resolution? See the full Conflict Resolution article. And, stay encouraged. You are more than a conqueror through Jesus Christ.